If Only I Could Speak
by fool-of-a-Took 247
Summary: "You don't want to die do you Lucius? They killed you Lucius. Don't you want to seek revenge? If you join me, I can save your life and end the lives of the ones who killed you. Don't you want that?"
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I own nothing apart from the plot line- all credit goes to J.K Rowling**

Colours. Red. Blue. White. Black. Shapes, dots and faces and buildings and memories. That constant beeping somewhere to my right. I cant move. Why cant I move? Am I dead? I don't want to die, I want to live my life. My wife, what about her? I feel so achy. What is that constant beeping? Where am I? The colours- they flash in front of my eyes again, breaking the constant darkness. Then they disappear, leaving me with an image. Walking out a pub. It's dark and I'm stumbling along the road. Then I see a van, racing towards me, its drivers face open half in shock and half in anticipation. Was I hit by the van?

Footsteps, coming from my right. Two pairs of shoes- one with heels and one without. Voices, again two of them. One a man's the other belonging to-

"Mrs Malfoy, I must warn you, the van caused a lot of damage to your husband. Are you sure you're ready to see him? Very well then- just through this door if you could follow me."

The creek of a door and then a gasp. She must be in the room.

"Our tests have said that your husband cannot hear us, he seems to be fully unconscious. I will bring-"

Wait. That's not right! I can hear! I can hear perfectly. I try to scream, but nothing comes out. I can feel someone holding my hand.

"I know this is a hard time for you Mrs Malfoy, but I must tell you, the technology needed to keep your husband alive is very expensive, and we have no idea how long we will have to use it for"

This should be fine. I'm ok. We have plenty of money. My inheritance had my future children's children sorted even if none of them worked, and that was before I started adding to it. I'll be Ok, we can pay it off no problem.

"We'd have to pay?"

"Yes, I'm afraid so."

"But we have next to no money. We can hardly buy food, let alone-"

No! What is she saying? We're richer than everyone we know! We have plenty of money!

"My husband always said, if he were to be in a situation like this, he would want to go. If it were his time, he would want to go."

No! This can't be happening. I never said that. I don't want to die. I can't die. I have so much more to do in my life.

"Are you sure Mrs Malfoy? This is a very big and difficult decision for you and we understand that, we can give you time to think this through,"

"No, he would want me to live my life, I'm sure."

"Ok, I will let you say your last goodbyes."

I try to move, to speak. To give some indication that I can hear them, that I'm conscious, but still nothing happens. Her hand on mine feels like it's crushing me. What was she saying? I have never said anything like that? Why is she lying? If only I could speak. The hand leaves mine and the door opens.

"I have said goodbye."

"Ok, I am sorry for your loss Mrs Malfoy."

Why are they talking about me like I'm dead? I'm not dead! I'm a Malfoy! Surely they won't actually turn off the support? This can't be real, it just can't be. This isn't meant to happen. Why would she betray me now? I can hear footsteps approaching my bed. They wouldn't, surely they wouldn't. Please somebody hear me. I'm not ready to die. They can't. She wouldn't. This can't be real. People always listen to me, why not now? I don't want to die. If only I could speak.

* * *

Another empty bed. Another one gone. And somewhere, not too far away, another widow. Young and beautiful, she drinks her champagne in her silk dress and diamond necklace. Years ago when she first married him, he told her she was ugly and fat. Ordered her around, used her as a punching bag when drunk. She wasn't aloud to speak, she might let the truth out. She was only an object. A beautiful, stupid, careless object. Now she's free from his own careless ways. Oh the irony.

**(A/N) Well there you have it, my second fic! It's a wee bit angsty. I might continue this, but for now it's just a one shot. Reviews are always welcome! **

**Thankyou**

**Pippin**


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I own nothing. Everything you recognize belongs to J.K Rowling

"Lucius..."

What was that?

"Lucius..."

Who is this? I don't recognize the voice. I must be dead now, they turned off my life support. How can I hear things?

"Open your eyes Lucius. Move around. You're not dead…"

Who is this? Who are you? How aren't I dead? I was dead. I try to move, but this time it works. I open my eyes to a blinding light. When my eyes adjust, I see that I'm standing in a bank. One very similar to Gringotts.

"Do you recognize this place Lucius? I do."

To my right stands a cloaked figure. His black cape swirls around him in some non-existent breeze. Out of a crack in the material, I can see the tip of a wand. Who is this?

"What were you doing in muggle London Lucius? I saw the accident. It didn't look pretty. Your body, was broken. Your bones, smashed, shattered on the road. Your stationary body lying in a pool of your own blood whilst filthy muggles just stared."

How does he know this? I try to tell him I was in muggle London for business, but he just shakes his head and starts to nonchalantly inspect his nails.

"Aren't they disgusting creatures Lucius? They didn't help you at all. I know. I was there. That doctor, he turned off your life support. Animals. They are no use in this world Lucius. You know this. I can read it in your mind. You've wanted to stop business with them for many years. Why haven't you? Is it because you think you're alone? You're not. Believe me you're not. So many other people want to put a stop to this problem for good. They want to exterminate the dirty, uncivilised muggles. They killed you Lucius. Don't you want to seek revenge? If you join me, I can save your life and end the lives of the ones who killed you. Don't you want that?"

I nod. Too stunned to think properly. This man in front of me. He can save my life. I will do anything to stay alive. Killing the creatures is an added bonus.

"Very well Lucius. There is no going back now. My name, is Lord Voldemort and welcome to the Death Eaters."

(A/N) Hi guys! I've decided to make a proper fic out of this! Exciting! Here's a short chapter for you! Tell me what you think!

Pippin


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I own nothing. Everything you recognize belongs to J.K Rowling

Narcissa lay on her king-sized bed, her platinum blonde hair sprawled out onto the silk sheets behind her. She was free. Her bruises were fading, no new ones added. She had just come back from a meeting with her sister Andromeda. For the first time in 3 years she felt free. Free from the suffocating life she had been trapped in. There was no one shouting or getting angry at her. No hiding in fear of being murdered. No threats of crucio or imperio. She was planning on leaving the manor forever. An apartment in muggle Paris would do. The house elves could be sent to Hogwarts or even the Weasleys- she didn't care. She just wanted to be away from the memories and stares, questions and pretend sympathy.

She lay for a while in her imaginary world till she heard a noise. The house had always scared her- since she was a child small child, coming here with her parents so that they could organise future wedding plans with her fiancé's family. Somewhere, downstairs, a door slammed. How could this be possible? The wards are all up. Only Malfoys can get in, and with her being the only remaining Malfoy, no one should be able to get in. No one can get in.

Narcissa slowly sat up and picked her wand up from the marble dresser opposite the bed. She cast a silencing charm on her feet and the stairs and started to creep down the cream, cold steps. She heard voices coming from the drawing room. How could this be? No one can get in here.

She turned the corner and held out her wand, ready to attack if necessary. The door to the drawing room was open a crack and she peered round it. Two figures stood in the centre of the room, dark cloaks shielding their faces.

"Lucius… it appears we have company."

'Lucius? No… it can't be… Lucius is dead.' One of the figures started to turn to face Narcissa and slowly reached up a hand, as he did so, the material of the cloak slipped down exposing a pale arm, but something was different, marring the porcelain skin was an ugly black mark, as if the arm had been charred. The hand grasped the hood of the cloak and pulled it down. There, standing as alive as Narcissa, was Lucius Malfoy.

"Hello darling. Missed me?"

(A/N) Sorry it took so long... but better late than never? Things will start getting more interesting soon. Reviews are always welcome don't be scared to leave one! I'll try to update more

Pippin


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I own nothing. Everything you recognize belongs to J.K Rowling

Narcissa's wand fell from her fingers and rolled under a cabinet. She reached in front to try and close the door so she could run… somewhere, anywhere. Lucius, sensing her plan and strode forward and stuck his foot in front of the door.

"What's wrong Cissy? Aren't you happy to see me?" He leered, a sinister grin on his face.

There was a small cough from behind Lucius and he turned around. The other figure in the room walked towards the Malfoy's, his hood still hiding his face.

"Now now Lucius" Came a silk like voice from behind the cloak. "Be gentle, you haven't even introduced me to her yet."

"Sorry, my Lord. This is my _lovely, obedient _wife Narcissa" Narcissa's eyes widened in fear as the cloaked man beckoned her forwards. She tried to take a step back but somehow she couldn't. Her feet were moving against her will towards the man. He couldn't have used the imperius curse on her could he? Not only was that illegal but he didn't even speak.

"Narcissa, Narcissa I don't care about the law, and I'm more powerful than you realise." Narcissa turned paler… how could he have heard her thoughts? "The Dark Lord hears many things Narcissa… I saved your husband, don't you want to thank me?" Narcissa stayed silent not wanting to answer this strange, unknown man. "So quiet." The man reached out a hand and stroked her cheek. "So… pale." Narcissa flinched and tried to turn away from his hand. "Don't be disobedient now… I heard what you did to Lucius." At this Lucius came forward and spoke.

"My Lord, shouldn't she be punished? She-"

"No" The word was calm but said with such force, it seemed to make the room a lot colder. . "How cunning, what a plan. I am proud… proud of you Narcissa. To strike when your prey was at its weakest, that is a truly admirable Sssslytherin trait, a cunning, beautiful pureblood is just what I need. Where to place you in my ranks…"

"But my Lord-"

"Crucio." Lucius fell to the ground in agony, screams of pain filling the room. Narcissa froze in shock. "I will have no weakness in my army." The man ended the curse and Lucius shakily got to his feet.

"I am sorry my Lord" He said with a bow.

"To be killed by your wife. To be struck down by a muggle. I cannot think of anything more disgraceful. You need to regain your honour. Find me followers Lucius. Loyal followers, ones that will not let me down."

"Yes my Lord. Of course my Lord." Said Lucius as he apparated away.

"Now, Narcissa, we still have not been properly acquainted yet. My name, is Lord Voldemort" The hand that had been resting on her cheek rose up and pulled down the hood. The man standing in front of her seemed to be in his late forties, curly brown hair with grey flecks covered one of the man's blue eyes. Those eyes were not friendly, they were sinister and held so much evil that Narcissa instantly lost any sliver of remaining hope that she was safe. But there was something else intriguing in the man's eyes. They say that the eyes are the window to the soul, but these eyes were missing something, it was as if they were not whole, as if his soul was not whole.

"Clever, Narcissa, you are clever. How easily you work things out. I can see that you will be vital for my army, so clever. But where to put you? A fragile woman like you should not be fighting. You are confused… I plan to eliminate all muggles, mudbloods and halfbloods. Us purebloods are the only ones who deserve magic don't you agree? Your husband Lucius agrees. He has gone to find me more followers, for there will be resistance. This world is corrupt, with muggle lovers like Dumbledore in power. My way is the only way for the wizarding world to continue… We must eliminate all those beneath us, and for that we will need fighters… but you Narcissa are not a fighter… you will be my mistress. Now leave, I must prepare for an iniciation ceremony with the followers Lucius is bringing."

Narcissa turned and walked out the room. Once the door had closed, she sprinted up the stairs to her room and began to pack. She had to get out. She had to get out. This couldn't be happening. Followers… for what… What had Lucius done, how was he alive. Who is Voldemort? He was not a man, but a monster… to use unforgiveables so callously… So many questions ran through her head. She zipped up her case, and reached for her wand to shrink it… then she remembered, her wand was in the drawing room… she'd have to do without her things. She rushed to her table, pulled out a quill and parchment and started to write two letters. She whistled for her owl and it swooped in through the open window. After attaching the letters, she crept down the stairs. She was almost at the main doors when she heard a voice behind her.

"Going somewhere?" Narcissa felt fear wash trough her. She turned around to face a grinning, angry Lord Voldemort.

(A/N) I really enjoyed writing this chapter, it's the longest one yet... even if it is still quite short. I have a good idea of where this story is going now. This part is set in the early/mid 1970s so Voldemort is in his late 40s early 50s and Lucius and Narcissa are about 19/20 my head cannon is that they were married as soon as they were out of school in an arranged marriage. More characters will be introduced in the next couple of chapters including Andromeda, Dumbledore and Snape (Snape yay)

Any way, don't forget to review, it'll make me update quicker!

Pippin


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